The
wedding was held at the Angel
Orensanz Center In New York City
The
following is a transcript of the ceremony, which was absolutely beautiful
...
| Friends,
we have gathered together today to recognize and celebrate the union
of this man and this woman, of Jason and Carolyn, who have come to
one another in love and who desire that their affection for one another
be transformed into permanent union. |
|
| Carolyn
and Jason stand before you under a Chuppah. Traditionally with the
birth of a Jewish girl an acacia tree was planted, at the birth of
a boy, a cedar. When the children grew up and were to be married,
the trees were cut down and used to make their wedding canopy. This
canopy has been made by you. Each patch that you sent back full
of your thoughts and wishes has been sewn into its fabric. Friends
and family, people from all parts of Carolyn's and Jason's lives have
made this canopy into a symbolic branch which reflects where they
have come from. In addition, the poles which support the Chuppah
were cut quite literally from the four corners of Carolyn's and Jason's
lives: One is from Pittsburgh, where Carolyn was born; one from Rockford,
where Jason's family lives; one branch comes from Los Angeles where
they met; and finally one branch is from New York City where they
make their home and will embark upon their married life. Let
this archway represent the wedding home Jason and Carolyn will make
together, the cover of their bed, the shelter they will give their
children. |
|
| Carloyn
and Jason now stand under this chuppah together, but they arrived
here from very different religious and ethnic backgrounds. What
you are witnessing here is an Ethical Culture Wedding Service. Ethical
Culture has a philosophy dedicated to the concepts that the highest
value on earth is human worth, that we must strive to protect the
mother earth upon which we are solely dependent, and that every person
on earth has an equal right to live with dignity and in harmony with
one another. |
|
| It
is indeed fitting and proper that this company of friends and relatives
should be gathered together to join in this happy occasion, for marriage
is a public as well as a private affair. Its outer relations are with
the wider family of humanity. |
|
But marriage
is basically and primarily a very private commitment. I do not marry
Carolyn and Jason. We together do not create this marriage-they create
it. We but assist at its initiation. In ancient Chinese society, for
instance, the company of relatives and friends at a wedding often went with
the bride and groom to the foot of a mountain, but no further. Then together
the couple climbed the mountain and stood for a moment at the top, watching
the setting sun, holding hands, symbolizing the essential fact that the
essence of marriage is the very private concern of those who form its union.
READING
by Alexandra Lopez
Teodoro Luna's Two Kisses
Mr.
Teodoro Luna in his later years had taken to kissing
His
wife
Not
so much with his lips as with his brows.
This
is not to say he put his forehead
Against
her mouth-
Rather
he would lift his eyebrows, once quickly:
Not
so vigorously he might be confused with the villain
Famous
in the theaters, but not so little as to be thought
A
slight movement, one of accident. This way
He
kissed her
Often
and quietly across tables and through doorways,
Sometimes
in photographs, and so through the years themselves.
This
was his passion, that only she might see. The chance
He might
feel some movement on her lips
Toward
laughter.
-Alberto
Rios
| As
those of us who are older know quite well, a good marriage takes many
years to be fully realized. The great joys of the early years of marriage
can increase many times, and be much greater as the couple grow together,
learn more about each other, and share life's experiences . |
|
| This
togetherness of marriage is its chief element; this sharing; this
giving and receiving of joy; this helping and assisting in -times
of sorrow and pain and unhappiness. Thus is joy increased many times
and thus is suffering lessened because of this sharing. |
|
| But
we, who would be realistic, recognize that the separateness of marriage
is important too. Each should continue to fulfill himself and herself
and should be able to do so much more creatively because of a good
marriage. |
|
A good
marriage is that in which each appoints the other guardian of his solitude
Once the
realization is accepted that even between the closest human beings infinite
Distances
continue to exist, a wonderful living side by side can grow up. If they
succeed in loving the distance between them which makes it possible to see
the other whole and against a wide sky.
| Finally,
a good marriage is unique. This particular marriage has never occurred
before, and will never occur again in quite this way. This is your
opportunity, who form this union, to create a relationship which is
beautiful, original, meaningful.... you bless each other and those
who surround you on this happy day. |
|
| Polish
tradition requires that the bride and groom share bread, wine, and
salt . Let this Polish wedding feast bread, baked by Adrienne Janicki,
signify the wish of their parents that they should never go hungry,
|
|
| (The
Janickis hand them slices of bread-they taste the bread). |
|
| As
they place a grain of salt on their tongues, we hope that they can
overcome the bitterness in life. |
|
| (Carolyn
and Jason each take a pinch of salt) |
|
| Finally,
let this wine, offered by Ellen Kelson, represent the sweetness
of life which will be shared |
|
| (The
bride and groom sip the wine). |
|
| In
mutual consecration and ever deepening love for one another , may
you establish a true home, one which is filled with the spirit of
faith, of truth of love. |
|
| Reading
by Craig Robillard |
|
|
| I
carry your heart with me carry it in |
|
|
| my
heart am never without it (anywhere |
|
|
| I
go you go, my dear; and whatever is done |
|
|
| by
only me is your doing, my darling) |
|
|
| not
fate (for you are my fate, my sweet) I want |
|
|
| no
world (for beautiful you are my world, my true) |
|
|
| and
it's you are whatever a moon has always meant |
|
|
| and
whatever a sun will always sing is you |
|
|
| here
is the deepest secret nobody knows |
|
|
| (here
is the root of the root and the bud of the bud |
|
|
| and
the sky of the sky of a tree called life; which grows |
|
|
| higher
than soul can hope or mind can hide) |
|
|
| and
this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart |
|
|
| I
carry your heart (I carry it in my heart) -E.E. Cummings |
|
| And
now will you take hands? |
|
| Do
you Jason take Carolyn, whom you hold by the hand, to be your true
wife, to love, honor, and cherish in joy and in pain, in sickness
and in health, forsaking all others? |
|
A. "I
do."
| And
do you Carolyn take Jason, whom you hold by the hand, to be
your true husband, to love, honor, and cherish in joy and in pain,
in sickness and in health, forsaking all others ? |
|
A. "I
do."
| And
may we all join in their pledge to help make this a world at peace,
a world of authentic brotherhood, a world without the blight of prejudice,
a world in which children can live out their lives untouched by war
or poverty, fear or hate. May all that is noble, lovely and true abide. |
|
| What
emblems do you have of your love and regard for one another? |
|
(Best
Man hands the rings to the person doing the ceremony, who says;)
| From
time immemorial the circlet of metal has been an emblem of the sincerity
and permanence of the wedding couple's love and regard for one another
and of their union. As the precious metal turns again upon itself,
so does a good marriage turn upon itself for its refreshment and its
renewal. |
|
| Jason
take this ring and place it on Carolyn's finger |
|
| I
will love you for the rest of my days; every waking hour, every
restful hour, every morning and every night, every spring, summer,
autumn and winter, every time the sun rises and every time the sun
sets. You are my one true love and you always will be my one
true love… |
|
| Fortiter,
Fideliter, Feliciter: Boldly, Faithfully, Happily. Wherever
the great adventures of life take us, I have only one way, and that
is with you. Take this ring, and with it my love. From
this day forward, I become your husband. |
|
| Carolyn
take this ring and place it on Jason's finger |
|
| We
have already journeyed together from the moonlit beaches of Southern
California, where I fell in love with you playing by the sea, across
this nation to the splendor of New York City, where my love for you
grows larger with each day until it competes with the skyscrapers.
You put the twinkle in my eye and the bounce in my step. I pledge
to spend my days and nights faithfully and lovingly by your side.
You are my true friend. You are my true love. |
|
| Fortiter,
Fideliter, Feliciter: Boldly, Faithfully, Happily. Wherever
the great adventures of life take us, I have only one way, and that
is with you. Take this ring, and with it my love. From
this day forward, I become your wife. |
|
| Now
by the authority vested in me by the State of New York and as a member
of the Council of Leaders of the American Ethical Union and in the
presence of these witnesses, I do declare you husband and wife and
join with this happy company in wishing you every success and every
joy in the days ahead. |
|
|
| WHOM
LOVE HAS JOINED TOGETHER, LET NO ONE PUT ASUNDER. |
|
Today
as man and woman you have given one another rings as gifts at your wedding.
Now that you are husband and wife you have a different gift to give
one another. That gift is a rose. A rose has long been considered a symbol
of love.
(Bride
and Groom exchange roses)
In
some ways it seems like you have done nothing at all. Just a moment
ago you were holding one small rose- and now again you have a rose in your
hand. This is what a marriage ceremony is like. Tomorrow may
seem no different than yesterday. But in fact today, just now, you
have given and received one of the most valuable and precious gifts. Everything
has changed and nothing has changed.
Reading
by Debra Goddfader
Is
Love then, so simple my dear?
the
opening of a door
And
seeing all things clear?
I
did not know before.
I
had thought it unrest and desire
Soaring
only to fall
Annihilation
and Fire:
It
is not so at all.
I
feel no desperate will,
but
I think I understand
Many
things, as I sit quite still,
with
Eternity in my hand.
-Irene
Rutherford Mcleod
 |
We will conclude with a poem from a Native American Wedding |
| "Now
you will feel no rain, for each of you will be shelter to the other. |
|
| Now
you will feel no cold, for each of you will be warmth to the other. |
|
| Now
there is no more loneliness; now you are two persons, but there is
only one life before you. |
|
| Go
now to your dwelling place to enter into the days of your life together, |
|
| And
may your days be good and long upon the earth." |
|
| After
the kiss, the band strikes up "Sto Lat" |
|
| Jeszcze
Raz, Jeszcze raz, niech zyje, zyje nam |
|
 |
